What Is A House?

When it appears in a dream

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In the years since I set out on my own, after rejecting the systems and relationships that once felt like the only path for me, I lost my ability to dream. Not the day variety of hopes and plans, and one-day-maybes, but the real nocturnal variety, when the subconscious mind is freed.

Having once been gifted with profound and deeply meaningful, symbolic and rich dreamscapes, the sense of waking from a solid sleep without the lingering remnants of those surreal impressions, was an inexplicable desertion.

But lately my nighttime messengers have been inching their way back into my psyche. Two in succession over the past few weeks still pressing their way into my daily thoughts, asking me to pay attention.

One was a tornado rumbling down the street, blowing off the roof, the doors, the dressing of the house. The other revealed a strip of my hair, which had previously been long and bleached blonde, mysteriously shaved, leaving newly budding black roots exposed between the length of blonde that still hung on either side.

Both dreams came with a similar theme; loss, destruction, outside forces inflicting perceptible damage, leaving the structure, the being, vulnerable and exposed. Yet underscoring each, was a knowing that the foundation was sound, renovations are coming.

What is a house, when it appears in a dream, but a representation of the physical body? The hair, speaking to a sense of identity and power. Beyond a doubt these past few years have stripped me down to the studs, changed me, deconstructed my beliefs. But with these dreams comes a promise, that what still remains after the storm is the essence of all that is right and true within me.