An Invitation to the Table
And for some, an invitation to leave, with love, of course. So much love to you.
What a headline. I’m already cringing, feeling the inner backlash of my good girl shield who tries so desperately to be liked by everyone by staying quiet and being good in order to prove her worth. Acknowledgements to that little girl who resides inside of me. I see you. I love you. I’m here for you.
If you haven’t already decided to unsubscribe from this blog, just based on the byline and the sheer audacity of some nobody artist who wrote it, then I hope you will reserve judgment and allow me to explain. Or not. You are the boss of you. Respect.
Oh, and to those who also subscribe to my other blog—Recovering Your Intuitive Voice for Art + Life (phew, that is a mouthful, IK), you are not imaging it, this is a cross-post (cross as in, both platforms, but not intended to make you cross), you did indeed receive the same post in your inbox twice today.
So onward.
I’m writing in a semi-sort-of-response to my dear, and aggravating, friend
.1 Mostly she is a dear friend. Only aggravating in that way that a dear friend will challenge you to see what you do not want to see, and to say what is inside of you when you do not want to say it. And also my dear friend Amanda Jolley who, by the very way she lives and moves about her life as one of the most authentic people I know, also inspires and challenges me to speak and live my truth.I was going to start by saying this will be a short post, but I can already sense that it will not be. So if you are in a hurry, the TL;DR version is an invitation posted at the bottom2.
But I hope that most of you, if you have taken time to read this far, will continue on with me. I promise there is a point. For some, it may be a jagged one. The Unsubscribe feature is also at the bottom. Damn, that is the second time I’ve mentioned it. I really do want you all to stay. At least, hear me out.
Jan, my dear and aggravating friend, whom I love with my whole heart, asked me recently if I’d join her privately in writing an essay to open a discussion between us. Perhaps, Jan said, we were actually born for such a time as this.
Jan said she believes I have the gift of prophecy.
I’m afraid I cannot post what my initial response to her saying that without losing more of you here. Suffice it to say, it was a pretty solid and resounding OH HELL NO! at first.
At first.
and really it kind of still is.
But this morning something changed. Something invisible convicted me. Something deeper inside my spirit knew that even if I don’t believe that I was specifically and deliberately born at the time I was, for the very purpose of living through, and speaking up in this moment, there is no denying that I exist in it.
And so do you.
*Coincidentally* my morning read this past month—when I can convince myself to put down the doom scroll device and actually pick up a real book, is Surviving Storms: Finding the Strength to Meet Adversity3, written by Mark Nepo, a cancer survivor, turned spiritual teacher, and author of many absolutely breathtaking books and essays.
More on that in a few minutes.
First, I want to share what I had intended to write about this week, albeit from a more messy frame of mind, without all the fire in my belly conviction and clarity I feel today. The day after the election I received this in my DMs on Facebook:
I only realized after my response wouldn’t send, that I’d previously blocked this person for a similar response earlier that day. Ironically, not surprisingly, her own account is filled with content celebrating the outcome of the election. All very in-your-face bullying type political posts.
I no longer see it as my responsibility to be fair and open minded to those who take pleasure in mocking others. I don’t have enough energy or time to engage with anyone who seems to revel in hate. Block. Bye.
But here is what I would say, if this person seemed remotely interested in understanding, and what I want to say to all of you prior to issuing the invitation I came here to post:
I am well aware of what it will cost me to speak up and use my voice.
But after a lifetime of being conflict avoidant, too afraid to say the things that needed to be said, I’m even more aware of what it has cost me not to use my voice. Not only on the big stuff happening out there in the world, but in the everyday stuff within my own orbit, in my own family life, and within my own circles of friendship.
This is not my first rodeo with using my voice when it comes to matters that might be considered divisive online.
Whether we use our voices or choose to suppress them, there is a price to pay.
And because I believe in the times we find ourselves living in, it is imperative to know what the people and platforms we follow believe in and stand for, not just what they are against, here is a somewhat incomplete list of who I am, what I am for, and what I believe.
I will start by saying, what maybe is already obvious, but maybe you were waiting to be sure—I voted for Kamala Harris. I sincerely, wholeheartedly believe she is a strong, very very much qualified, capable leader. If this causes a strong reaction in you and you’re tempted to lash out at me in the comments section, please know that I will not engage with it.
Also, I’m pretty sure that most of you are not the type to lash out, regardless of your own political leanings or beliefs. You may not choose to continue following me, and that’s okay. Be well. Thank you for the time you were here.
That’s a long winded way of saying that I still believe that people are mostly good inside. Even when we are acting like assholes on the outside.
Inspired by the words of my dear friend, and current home and studio host, Amanda Jolley4, I’m just going to get a bit lazy now, and copy, along with some minor edits, the statement that went out in her newsletter yesterday.
Yep, yes, this too, is what I believe:
Please know that I support LBGTQ+ rights, women’s rights, racial equity, disability rights, and the upholding of all those oppressed. If you do not feel comfortable in a place run by a person that upholds these values, this blog is not for you.
I am Neurodivergent, which, I believe, has uniquely wired me to be sensitive to social justice issues, fairness, and matters on inequality. My official diagnosis came just over three short years ago at the age of 55 as AuDHD. Which means I am Autistic + ADHD and explains so much to me about my life, but weirdly has caused several mass exoduses from my blog5 in the past when I’ve talked about it directly.
I also think cats are far superior to dogs, but dogs are way more cuddly when you need them. And I swear a lot. I happen to ascribe to the belief that it’s a sign of a creative brain. So again, maybe this is a deal breaker for you. I don’t know.
I believe what my friend Jan sees as the gift of prophecy in me is directly related to my neurodivergent wiring. Pattern recognition, combined with the aforementioned sensitivities to social justice issues, plus the rhythm I so often hear in my head when I’m pushing words out onto the page as a writer, have provided me ample opportunity to speak truth to power on the screen.
And there were those two weirdly prophetic dreams I had back in 2015 that have since proven themselves to be true, but I digress. It’s pattern recognition, and my sensitive wiring through and through.
I marched in the 2017 Women’s March in Chicago. Marched again in a Black Lives Matter protest in Racine, Wisconsin, wore the symbolic pink pussy hat on my t-shirt and posted numerous posts about the things I feel convicted by and believe. I don’t say this as any sort of virtue signaling. I won’t be wearing a blue bracelet.
I am for your liberation. And, as spoken so well in 2004 by artist and activist Lillah Watson, I believe that my own liberation is bound up in yours.
I believe the liberation of your own authentic voice as an artist and human is the liberation of your entire being. It is the liberation of your culture. your society. your world.
OUR world. And I believe this election is going to have grim consequences for our world.
But I also believe that artists are uniquely positioned for such a time as this. We always have been.
Because, back to what I wrote about the gift of prophecy that my dear friend Jan spoke of, I believe that when an artist, or any human for that matter, has tapped into their own unique, intuitive, most authentic, core voice, they become truth speakers of the highest order.
I wholeheartedly believe that art is a healing modality. Art is a people connector. art provides us with community and a sense of belonging. Art gives us a voice to say what we cannot find the words to say.
Art is an act of resistance.
I have to admit, there hasn’t been a day since the election that I haven’t found myself bursting into tears at some point during the day. Until this morning, I couldn’t really even put into words all that I was feeling.
Shock. Grief. Disbelief. Horror at the thought of what has been promised on day one against people and people groups that I love.
Against humanity.
Against humans.
I’m still feeling those things. But rising inside at the moment is also conviction. The words that I had planned to focus on for 2025 taking on a whole new light in this moment: Community, Connection, and Collaboration.
And this is where the invitation comes in.
This morning I managed to open that book, Mark Nepo’s, from which the two quote images above were taken. Words jumped out at me, from the chapter I was reading, and I highlighted them to read and open for discussion in my membership group over on my Recovering Your Intuitive Voice blog tomorrow.
In that moment, I knew, that I needed to expand what this group was designed for. I plan to open this discussion around what Mark wrote and share what is on my heart for the future of our group.
The ideas that I am rolling around include a book club of sorts, utilizing the journal prompts in Mark’s book and others for weekly writing prompts, and possibly hosting more live zoom hangouts and discussions for members each month.
I’d like to discuss how we can support each other moving forward. How art can be used as a tool for each of us to heal and liberate our own unique, most authentic, core intuitive voices. Collectively and individually.
You are officially invited to join us for tomorrow’s group membership meeting. (Tomorrow, for those who may not be reading this post the day I wrote it, is Thursday, November 14th.) And though I may turn the camera on and record a short portion of it, our hangouts are typically not recorded, in order to allow the group members the ability to share more openly when we gather.
I’ve created a 7-day free trial coupon (COUPON HAS EXPIRED) that will allow you full access to all the current membership benefits, including the zoom link and details to attend if you’re interested in finding out more. (but you’ll need to act fast if you do want to attend the hangout-Thursday, November 14th at 2pm CST):
Yes, this is a subscription based group. Artists and teachers deserve to be paid for the time we invest. But if this is a financial obstacle for you to join and you are sincerely in need of this connection within community, please leave me a comment or hit reply and let me know.
This is a no pressure invitation. If it isn’t for you that is A-okay. Not trying to do a hardcore sales pitch here. I just sincerely believe that we are stronger when we are connected to a community. And we need each other.
For such a time as this.
Surviving Storms: Finding the Strength to Meet Adversity by Mark Nepo, 2022
Find Amanda Jolley/Studio Jolley/Studio Joy here
We are told to not get political in art groups, etc. As I am reading this Trump just nominated Matt Gaetz for Attorney General. There are no words.... You are doing the right thing. I don't know if I will be able to see the presentation tomorrow, but I applaud your move here.
I am so with you right now, feeling very lost and disheartened. We must regroup and move forward speaking our truths. Onward Chrystal